Things every parent should know before they are parents...

There are many things everyone should know before they are parents. This is just a minuscule portion of that information.

Companies you should invest in prior to parenthood:
1. diaper companies
2. diaper cream companies (Every parent should be issued a 55 gallon vat when their child is born.)
3. battery companies
4. toy companies
5. cleaning supply companies
6. kids clothing companies
7. laundry detergent companies

Ways to practice having a baby:
1. get a puppy let it get to about 6 months old and trade that in for another puppy, continue to do this for then next 18 years. (the only thing is the puppy will listen better)
2. when you go to sleep at night set an alarm clock to go off every 30 minutes, continue this also for 18 years.
3. find a sound that is the most annoying sound that you have ever heard in your life and play it continuously for an hour straight at least 12 times a day and two of those times must be while you are sleeping.

Things you will never have again:
1. freedom
2. personal space
3. sanity
4. a good night sleep
5. peace of mind
6. a clean house

But you will also never have this:
1. an empty heart
2. a lack of love
3. a lack of laughter
4. a lack of excitement
5. a lack of group hugs
6. a lack for a reason to smile
7. a lack for a reason to pinch cheeks (my personal favorite)!


I know there are many of you out there that can add to these lists, please feel free to do so.